I am only let to wonder why
by Lady Sarah85
Summary: This one's for the lonely. The ones that seek and find. Only to be let down. Time after time. Lucy is heartbroken and resentful since being sent back after VODT. Will Aslan allow her to return? And what of Caspian?
1. Chapter 1

I got the title and the begging of the description from Greg Laswell's song Comes and Goes. These glorious charcters are not mine, they belong to CS Lewis. Enjoy the story kiddies!

* * *

><p>It had been five year since Lucy Pevensie was in Narnia. Five years since she was told, that she could never return. Her older siblings, Susan and Peter who had been told the same thing nearly seven years previous,<p>

were getting on with their lives. Susan more so, she had abandoned Narnia. She claimed it was a game. Peter however, longed to return and Edmund felt much the same. Eustace was the one that felt sure he would

be able to return, what with the other's having had return trips. Lucy missed everything about Narnia. She missed the feeling of magic in the air, the strong feeling of belonging there. The sun didn't feel right in

England, it didn't warm her skin as it had on the deck of the Dawn Treader. Out of all the things see missed there was one face she longed to see more than any other: Caspian. Thoughts of him made her bones rattle

and her heart break. At the time of their good bye she felt only the sting of saying goodbye to a friend, but as the years ticked on she realized it was something more than that. It had been his company she most

craved when they were aboard the Dawn Treader, he had been the one she turned to for comfort. She was wracked with heart break, thinking that if she had only realized her feelings sooner perhaps Aslan would

have let her stay. Now she was convinced that Narnia had a Queen Caspian having married Ramandu's daughter. Who could resist a true star child? Of course Caspian would have picked her, over Lucy. He had been

enthralled with Susan when they had first met. It was a moot point any way, Caspian was in Narnia and Lucy was once again trapped in her world, with no hope of return. She was now twenty. The baby fat had long

since melted away and she found herself feeling as pretty as her sister. Lucy's demeanor however was still as it always was. Calm, even tempered and friendly to any and all. Susan, since moving to America cared for

nothing other than lipstick and boys and cocktail parties. Peter was still studying aboard but he wrote to Lucy fairly often. Edmund had joined the army, Lucy wasn't worried with this turn of events since the war had

ended. Lucy was staying with Eustace's family still. She had been working at the near by library for the past two years. She was captivated by it, reminder her simultaneously of the Professor's house in the county

where she had discovered the infamous wardrobe and the Magician's island mansion. She adored getting lost in the nearly endless stacks while putting books away. There was magic in the very air of that place. The

heady earthy scent of the aging books an elixir that eased her broken heart. It brought her back to her senses. For so long Lucy and her siblings had lived the strange paradox of having lived an adult life for nearly 16

years and then to be thrust back into being children, and now their second coming of age was turning out far different. Aslan had said that Lucy could find him in her world. She had looked but not whole heartily, the

growing resentment was like an open wound. Lucy felt that if she were to find Aslan with the way she had been feeling lately, she would give the lion a piece of her mind. She would let lose a roar of epic proportions

and demand explanations, and bargain and beg and plead and cry and beg some more if he would let her return to Caspian. She was giving up on even pretending that she missed anything else. There was nothing in

her world or his world, of Aslan country that she wanted to see more than Caspian's face. She wanted to see him smile at her, see the sun catch in his hair, and watch his eyes brighten in delight at the simplest

things. She want to feel his strong arms embracing her and smell the salty, spicy masculine scent that was all Caspian. But of course she hadn't really attempted to find the one being who could possibly allow her

this. Lucy slammed the book she was holding into its place on the shelf in pure frustration. She looked around guilty at the loud sound she had made in the nearly silent library. She finished the rest of her work and

made her way to her favorite part of the library. It was towards the back of the enormous building. There was a wrought iron circler stair case that went up five floors. At the top was a room that housed the library's

oldest and rarest books. The room had high floor to ceiling stained glass windows. Hung between each window were rich velvet tapestries. The middle of the room was littered with plush red sofas and arm chairs. The

floor nearly squashy under ones feet with soft carpets. It was a place to feel safe and hide in a book or in one's thoughts. Lucy found herself here every day when she had finished her work. She sat in her favorite

chair. It faced the windows where she could look out and see the ocean. This view was part of what made this spot the only one in her world in which she felt truly close to Narnia. She always made sure her work was

finished and she was perched in her chair in time for sunset. Lucy had convinced herself that sunset was the only time in which she was looking at the same sky as Caspian. They had watched so many sunsets

together. She sat there watching the sky darken and the clouds change color, the sun sinking deeper into the waves. She long to be on the deck of the Dawn Treader with Caspian leaning causally on the rail next to

her. Lucy closed her eyes to stop her tears as the final beam of sunlight disappeared. She spoke for the 1st in five years to Aslan, as she once had.

"Aslan, I don't belong here. I want to go home, to Narnia. To Caspian. It is of no matter what context I have in his life, I only wish to go home."

Lucy kept her eyes closed and controlled her breathing. She slowly relaxed, trying to let go of her resentment and hurt caused by being forced away from the one place she truly thought of as home. She was

exhausted. Completely tired of fighting, of begging, she simply just wanted to rest. Lucy lay her head on the arm of her chair, tears rolling off her face. She felt as though she had nothing left, just raw unadulterated,

emotion.

"_Lucy_," whispered a haunting voice that she had not heard in five years.

Her eyes snapped opened and Lucy found herself once again on the strip of sand at the end of the world, the perpetual wave circling behind her. Aslan was standing there. Lucy did not run to him as she once would

have. She would have buried her hands in his soft mane without hesitation. Things between the two of them had changed. Lucy found herself saddened by this, there was still however too much disappointment and

hurt left for her to forgive the lion.

"Are you angry with me dear heart?" Aslan asked walking closer to her.

Lucy's heart constricted painfully. "Yes, I am."

"Do you truly believe that I had exiled you to your own world?" Aslan sat calming right in front of her.

"Not exiled, just misinformed." Lucy spoke with a sigh. "I am exhausted Aslan. I do longer belong in my world. Too much has happened for me to simply go back to the everyday of this life. I want to go home."

"What of Caspian, dear one?"

"I love him." Lucy stated without preamble or ego. It was simply the truth.

"In what capacity?" Aslan probed.

"I would love him as man and wife if given the chance. I would love him as my king, as my friend or as my brother. I have loved him from afar since returning here. I only wish to be a part of his life. In whatever

capacity I am allowed. Not a distant memory or and ancient sovereign." Lucy finished angrily.

"And if I refuse your return?" Aslan asked standing once more.

"Then I will continue as I am." Lucy said sadly. "I will remain adrift and alone."

Perhaps in the past she would have spared Aslan the absolute bitter truth of her feelings, but no more.

"You will never return to your world if granted this." Aslan informed her with a growl. "Your family?"

"My family knows of my desire to return. They know of my love for Caspian." Lucy informed him.

Her agitation again breaking through. Aslan growled slightly louder. Lucy rubbed her face with her hands, gathering her thoughts.

"I am heart broken, Aslan. This is nothing in this world that will heal the wound. I beg you to send me home. Let me look upon the face I have longed to see."

Lucy dropped to her knees in front of Aslan. She allowed the full truth of her loneliness break across her face. It seemed to her that even the Great Lion was taken aback by her pain. The breeze caught her tears as

Lucy tilted her head back to look at the vanilla sky above her instead she found herself looking up at the ceiling of the library with a terrible crick in her neck. It had been a dream. A glorious and terrible dream. There

was nothing left of Lucy Pevensie's heart except for a cold, empty, burning hole. She dragged herself from the chair and began to trudge towards the stair. She glanced up at the stained glass needing to see

something other than flashes of her dream. At first she only saw what she expected to see, the mostly red and blue stained glass of an open book. She was then forced to take a second look, for that was clearly not

what she had seen. It was a very familiar scene. It something that had been imprinted upon her very soul, since the very moment it had happened. The outline of the glass was done in green and showed joyous

looking dryads and satyrs. The center was simple white glass with a few dark pine trees in the corners. The middle of this was of a small girl looking up at a lamp post in the middle of a forest. It was stained glass of

her. Lucy made a slightly strangled noise and tried to breathe. She was in Narnia, without a doubt.

"Lucy?" came a shocked question from behind her.

Lucy turned and clamped eyes on Coriakin, The Magician. She felt her legs collapse underneath her. She was home, it was then that the laughter started. Lucy laughed in relief, in hope, she finally felt the need to

really laugh for the first time in five years.

"Lucy dear girl, how did you get here?" Coriakin asked her as he helped Lucy to her feet.

It was now that the magician noticed how different she looked. Older, clearly older but more beautiful. The young girl he had seen before nearly erased.

"Aslan sent me back." Lucy told him feeling slightly surprised by his previous statement. "How long have I been gone?"

"Why the Dawn Treader set sail east not more than five days ago."

Lucy spluttered. This of course meant that The Dawn Treader had already made it to the end of the world. They would most likely on Ramandu's island. They would be headed this way soon on the return to Cair

Paravel. The mirth again bubbled up. She had to sit in a nearby chair to stop.

"Well Coriakin I can tell you on very good authority that the Dawn Treader made it successfully to the Utter East." In fact I would not surprised in the slightest if they arrive her very soon. It's good to be back. " Lucy

said with a sigh.

"How long have you been gone Lucy?" Coriakin asked again noticing the changes in his young friend.

"I have been in my world for five years. Aslan has allowed me this final return."

The stunned magician seemed processing all this very well, until he collapsed into a chair. Lucy shook her head and laughed softly. She stood and walked to the window. She overlooked the land of the Dufflepuds,

who she could see hoping on their one foot across the lawn. She could hear a thumping coming up the stairs. She turned to see two Dufflepuds hoping into the room, which she now recognized as the library were she

had found the Book of Incantations. As a library worker she felt rather guilty having torn out and then destroyed a page of that particular book. The Dufflepuds looked from Lucy to the uncurious magician in the chair.

"Murder!" they shouted and began to hop wildly around the room. "She's murdered the Oppressor!"

"I have not!" Lucy defended herself vehemently. "He's merely fainted!"

"Nope clearly murder!" One of them shouted hoping out of the room.

"To arms gents!" shouted the second one following his companion from the room.

"Oh bloody hell," Lucy said dropping her shaking head into a hand.

"That's no way for a lady to speak." Coriakin laughed.

He had awoken from the racket the Dufflepuds had made. The two made their way down stairs where they met an army of Dufflepuds. The two who had hopped away came back with five more of their friends.

"Murderer!" They chanted at Lucy. Then they took sight of Coriakin. "Oppressor! There is a ship!"

"I'd say their coming to continue the oppression!" One called out from the back.

"Seems your friends have returned." Coriakin said smiling to Lucy. "Lucy?"

Lucy had taken off running as soon as the word 'ship' was mentioned. She kicked off her oxford shoes as she ran they were cumbersome and slipping in the manicured grass. She raced the wind to reach the beach.

She saw the beauty that was the Dawn Treader anchored of the coast. She saw a long boat being lowered, and a first one already making land. Many of the crew she recognized but she saw not the face she longed

for. She saw him as he jumped from the long boat and looked around. Caspian looked exactly the same. Lucy knew full well that while it had been five years for her, for Caspian it had only been over a week. Her eyes

hungrily raked over his face. The beard seemed slightly thicker and there seemed to be a light missing from his eyes. It was at this moment that Caspian looked up in Lucy's direction. She saw him look, shake his

head and look again. Lucy smiled hoping that he would recognize her. The look on Caspian's face was priceless. He looked both confused and very happy. He took off running towards her just as Lucy did the same.

When they met on the sand Caspian had stopped running to gather a still running Lucy in his arms. He countered her momentum by swinging her up and around in a circle. Lucy was both crying and laughing and

gripping Caspian shoulders like a life line. He had stopped spinning to look at her. Caspian looked awed. The light that had seemed to be missing was back ten fold.

"You look different," Caspian said, at last noticing.

Lucy laughed. "I have been gone for five years Caspian. Aslan let me come home."

Caspian whooped loudly and began swinging Lucy around in the air again. Lucy was laughing finally feeling free. She had found Caspian again. He plopped her back on the sand the get a better look at her. She was

beautiful Caspian thought. The young girl he had said a painful farewell to not a week ago, had been replaced by with his dream. He had long been drawn to Lucy. When they had first met she was a wonderful friend

he had been quite taken with Susan but latter retrospection had made the young King realize the if Lucy had been of age he would have been far more interested in her. When Lucy had been sailing with them, he

knew that if Lucy had been just a little older and had been able to stay he would have asked for her hand. She was returned and she was five years older. He pulled Lucy into his arms wrapping her tightly, afraid she

would disappear. He felt Lucy's arms automatically come up around his shoulders, her head buried in the crook of his neck. She subtlety inhaled Caspian's scent. How she had missed him, her memories had truly not

done Narina's King justice. Lucy felt as though the missing piece of her very soul had clicked back into place. Caspian's grip on her became slightly tighter

"I shall not let you leave again," he whispered fiercely and placed a kiss on the top of her head.

Lucy smiled and held on tighter herself. "I never wished to leave in the first place. I am here to stay." she whispered back.

Caspian stepped back a tiny bit and tilted Lucy's chin up to look at him. Her bright blue eyes locked onto his dark brown. Without a thought he pressed his lips gently to Lucy's. Her mind was suddenly wiped clean of

all thoughts except her love for Caspian. Her eyes slid shut. This moment had been a dream, a fleeting hope of a barely possible possibility. She moved her lips in time with Caspian slightly more expressive ones.

Sweet, soft and lovely were the adjectives that popped her mind like bubbles. When Caspian pulled back for air Lucy's eyes remained closed. She felt his forehead rest on hers and Lucy opened her eyes.

She saw herself reflected back in deep pools of black. There was a smile smirk playing across the young King's lips.

"I would have you never leave my side. To be no longer separated by circumstance, decorum, etiquette, or time."

"Are you asking to court me Caspian?" Lucy asked rather breathlessly.

She was actually surprised at her ability to be coy and form a coherent sentence considering the circumstances. Caspian reached up and held her face gently in his hands.

"I will court you, love you and make you my queen. I would love you in this world, in Aslan's country or in any other world."

Lucy stood on her tip toes to press a kiss of her own to Caspian's lips.

"I love you," she whispered as the kiss ended.

"As I love you my valiant queen."

* * *

><p>I could not get that story out of my head. It was rattling around up there for days. For now this is a one shot. i may add more some time later if the insperation hits. I hope you guys liked this though! thank for reading! Reviews are VERY welcome!<p> 


	2. Note

Note:

I am reopening this. I am writing more and I will have a nice long second chapter up over the weekend. And I will leave you guys with a few little teasers:

Lucy gets a surprise. The voyage home begins.


	3. Chapter 2

Caspian took Lucy's hand and the two walked back to greet the crew. There was an out pouring of surprised and joyful cheers. Lucy smiled at each of them feeling relief and joy at seeing them all again. The second

long boat hit the beach not long after, it was now that Lucy noticed someone being helped out of the boat: it was Ramandu's daughter. Lucy felt the wind knocked out of her lungs. The moment she had set foot back

in Narnia she had completely forgotten about this woman who could indeed threaten every Lucy thought she had just found. She must have mad some kind of sound. She imagined it sounded like a rather strangled,

panicked sob. She felt Caspian's hand squeeze hers and moved to stand in front of her.

"Lucy?" he asked with gentle concern. "What's happened?"

She glanced up at him feeling dread rising in her chest. She was some how able to smile up at him.

"She agreed to come with you?" Lucy asked somehow able to sound perfectly normal and polite. She hoped any way.

"She wishes to start a new life in my Kingdom."

"_In what capacity?" _Lucy thought viciously.

She was taken aback by the sudden angry jealously that ripped through her. She attempted to say something as equally polite as before but she couldn't. Caspian crouched down slightly to be at Lucy's eye level.

"As nothing more than a loyal subject and friend, my queen." Caspian spoke as though reading her mind. He pulled Lucy into his arms. "I love you Lucy. And only you."

"Does she know that?" Lucy mumbled into his chest.

Caspian laughed. "Come on Lu. At least say hello."

He practically had to drag Lucy over the star bright blonde standing by the water. She turned as they approached.

"Queen Lucy," she said with a low curtsey. "You have returned, for that I am glad."

Lucy swallowed down the need to strangle this woman and spoke: "Thank you."

Caspian wrapped an arm around her shoulders. He seemed to know how much it was costing Lucy.

"Lilliandil, has been a great friend on the voyage so far." Caspian told her.

Lucy growled lightly and Caspian laughed.

"His majesty was much altered after you left, your highness," Lilliandil told Lucy.

This seemed to sober Caspian up, Lucy however honed in on this information.

"Pray you explain what you mean." Lucy whispered desperately.

"Perhaps another time Lu." Caspian interrupted quickly. "Let's not keep Coriakin waiting."

He took Lucy's hand in his and starting walking towards the mansion. Lucy looked back towards Lilliandil who mouthed the word 'Later' to Lucy. She nodded in return and matched her pace to Caspian's.

The Captain and Caspian wanted to update their sea chart with Coriakin. Lucy had used this opportunity to say she was going to change, Caspian let her go with a kiss. She wandered to the bedroom she had stayed

in the last time she had stayed. She quickly stripped out of her simple blue dress and pulled off her muddy socks. She thought vaguely about finding her oxford shoes which were somewhere on the lawn. She had two

choices in front of her now. There were many flowing Narnian gowns, all beautiful with a wide array of colors. Or she could chose from pants, boots and lose fitting shirts. Lucy tapped in chin in thought and decided on

one of the dresses. She pulled on a puff sleeve top and over it went a long dress with small straps over her shoulders and laces up the back. It fell to just below her ankles. She pulled the laces on the sleeves just

above her elbows tighter so the tops of the sleeve puffed a bit more. The end of the sleeves tapering just a little over her hands. The shirt was white and off the shoulder, the dress was a dark deep maroon, it

reminded her of the color of the shirt Caspian was wearing when they had said goodbye. There was a matching pair of flat slippers in the softest purple velvet. She had finished dressing and was combing her hair up

into a slight side pony tail when there was a knock on her door.

"Come in," She said and finished her hair.

"Queen Lucy, may I speak with you?" Lilliandil asked.

Lucy turned to her and gestured to two chairs sitting in front of the fire. They each perched in one.

"You were saying before?" Lucy prompted.

"Your Highness, I wanted to ease your mind. You have nothing to worry from me. Caspian had spoken to no one after your cousin, brother and yourself had left. The captain told me that he had simply instructed

them to sail for Narnia and then locked himself in his cabin. He did not emerge except for meals and when he did he looked as though someone had died."

Lucy's heart clenched. She had only known the pain of her own suffering. Lilliandil still had more to say.

"When they returned to my father's island Caspian came to speak to me. He appeared to me a man apart. He spoke the following to me: 'When first I saw you, I thought only that perhaps you would be a match for

me. A match to be Queen of Narnia. I am sorry to say that my heart has changed. My heart has left me for another world.' it was then that he fell to his knees, face in his hands. 'I long only for one who I can never

have.' he looked up at me with a tear stained face. 'Do you see anything in the stars Lilliandil? Will she ever come back?' I placed my had upon his head soothingly and said: 'I have trained in star reading but I am no

Centaur, your majesty. I do not know.' he looked away then as though all hope had been dashed upon the rocks. 'Then my heart truly is lost.' he stood then and turned to head back to his ship. I stopped him with a

hand on his arm.

'My king I still desire to sail to your kingdom and perhaps provide the comfort of a friend with open ears.' he smiled and nodded his consent. All he spoke of, when he spoke at all was of you, your highness. You have

not been from his thoughts or his heart. The change in him since your return has been amazing to watch. He is himself again, as he is with no but you."

Lucy looked up at the women she had imagined to be her rival. "You have no romantic interest in Caspian at all?"

"None whatsoever. I only wish to be his friend." Lilliandil left her chair to kneel in front of Lucy. She took her hand. "And your friend if you will allow it your majesty."

Lucy smiled and squeezed the slightly smaller hand in hers. "Of course. Thank you for telling me this."

Lilliandil returned to her chair. "I am glad I have eased your mind."

Lucy opened her mouth to reply but she was cut off by a huge yawn.

"Excuse me," she said with a laugh.

"You must be exhausted, Your highness."

"Lucy, please."

Lilliandil smiled. "Why don't you take a nap Lucy. I will inform The King as such."

"Thank you Lilliandil," Lucy said standing. "I shall not sleep for too long."

"Sleep well Lucy," Lilliandil stood with a curtsy and left, closing the door lightly.

Lucy crawled on top of the large four poster. She sank into the feather stuffed mattress and pillow. She was asleep before her shoes hit the soft carpet beside the bed. When Lucy awoke it was dark, except for the low

burning fire in the grate and the low burning gas sconces. It was then that she noticed Caspian sitting in a chair next to the bed. He had leaned his head down on the mattress and had one of her hands gently held in

his. She reached down with her free hand to run it through his silky soft hair. Lucy was again struck by how much she had missed this. The simple touches she and Caspian had shared. The easy friendship that had

developed since the first time they met. The feeling of when that friendship turned to love. How she longed for Caspian to have actually been there when she realized it. For it to have been a sweet and wonderful

discovery, rather than the cold heartbreaking realization that had occurred. Lucy sighed and shook those thoughts from her head. It didn't matter now, she was home and Caspian loved her in return. She smiled

finally having slept well for the first time in five years and being able to at long last wake up happy. She curled her body around Caspian's hand wrapped in hers and returned to sleep, a smile on her face.

* * *

><p>I hope you guys enjoyed that! Chapter 3 is coming up soon. The return trip home begins! Reviews are very welcome! thanks!<p> 


	4. Chapter 3

Sorry for the upped rating but this is going to be at least a T from here on out...maybe a little something more if you've been good. Enjoy! and thanks!

* * *

><p>When Lucy awoke for the second time she quickly noticed two things. One: there was bright sunlight streaming in through the windows. Two, being the most important she was wrapped in Caspian's arms. His chin<p>

was resting on top of her head, which was tucked against his very warm chest. She laying half on top of him. Their legs tangled together with her dress which had ridden up to thigh level. Caspian had one hand on

her hip and the other was rubbing soothing circles on her back. Lucy was in heaven. After five years of absolute hell this was too much. She tried valiantly to hold back her sobs but to no avail. She turned her face

into Caspian's chest and let go. Caspian's arms instantly grew tighter around her.

"It's alright love, I've got you." Caspian whispered, pressing a kiss to her head.

Lucy poured out every feeling of sadness, hopelessness and heartbreak that she had been carrying since she had left Narnia. Caspian held her tightly and continued rubbing circles on her back easing the pain caused

by all her crying. Lucy was able to pull herself together soon than she thought. If not for Caspian holding her, Lucy would have carried on for far longer. Her sobs turned into hiccups and she was able to sit up slightly.

She whipped her eyes and met Caspian's slightly concerned brown eyes that were studying her face.

"I love you," Lucy sighed. The words slipped from her mouth as easy as breathing. Loving Caspian now felt like the most natural thing in the world. It seemed to Lucy that there had never been a time in which she

wasn't in love with the handsome king.

"I love you Lucy."

Caspian sat up against the head board and pulled Lucy with him. Her back pressed against his chest and his arms firmly around Lucy's waist. The two stayed entwined in silence as the sun cut a path across the floor.

"I am truly sorry I left Caspian." Lucy whispered starring decidedly at the patterns the sunlight made upon the carpet. "If I had known how I felt about you then I would have begged Aslan to let me remain."

Caspian tightened his hold on her. "You are here now Lucy. I will not let you leave again for anything."

Lucy turned in his arms too look up at him. She was struck by how handsome Caspian truly was. Lucy felt the wind knocked out of her by the look of love shining in his eyes. She leaned in to press her lips to his when

of course her stomach chose that as a perfect time to growl, loudly. Her eyes instantly flicked to Caspian's as her face turned red. Caspian first snorted, then giggled before finally bursting into full blown laughter.

Lucy crossed her arms in a huff and attempted to look annoyed but Caspian's boyish laughter was too much to resist. She had missed the sound of his laughter, hell there wasn't a thing about Caspian she hadn't

missed. As Lucy was distracted by her laughter, Caspian changed their position. Lucy gasped as she felt the mattress come up to meet her back as Caspian hovered over her. Lucy's eyes fluttered shut as Caspian

began to lean for a kiss. When Caspian's lips met hers it was unlike any other kiss they had shared before. It was like liquid fire. Lucy's bones were aflame and there was nothing to put out the blaze not that she

would have wanted to. Caspian's arms came up around her back pulling her closer. His soft lips powerful against hers. When his tongue gently asked for entrance Lucy whimpered and complied willingly. Her hands

wound themselves into Caspian's hair, she pulled lightly to bring him closer and he moaned into her mouth. When breathing became an issue Caspian wrenched his lips from hers only to move them to the crux were

Lucy's neck met her shoulder.

"Caspian," Lucy whispered breathlessly.

His rough bread tickling her neck. Caspian returned to kissing her lips. One of his arms had moved from underneath. She felt his hand works its way onto to her hip before it moved across her ribs before cupping her

breast through her dress. Lucy's back arched and she moaned into the kiss. Of course someone had to start knocking on the door. Caspian was able to roll them quickly out of the kiss and into a less compromising

position with Lucy head resting on his shoulder, her burning blush hidden from the door. Lilliandil opened the door slowly while knocking.

"Good morning your majesties." She spoke as though she hadn't noticed Lucy's dress half way up her thighs, or the slightly ragged breathing. "Lucy there is a bath drawn for you. Breakfast is downstairs."

Lucy rolled in Caspian arm that was around her shoulder. "Thank you Lilliandil. I'll be one minute."

"Of course Lucy. Your Highness, Captain Drinian wants a word." Lilliandil told Caspian and softy shut the door once more.

"You should take your bath. There should be a fair tide by the afternoon." Caspian spoke reluctantly pulling away from Lucy.

"Alright. I'll meet you for breakfast then?" Lucy asked climbing out of bed.

Caspian walked over and pulled her towards him for a hug. "Yes."

He spun her towards the door with a swift and soft slap to her but.

"Hey!" Lucy cried with a giggle.

With a quick kiss they separated. Lucy made her way to her bath. The bath room was pure white. Large squared white tiled floors and walls. The ceiling was a different story. It was painted a bright summertime blue

with big fluffy clouds. There was a claw foot tub in the middle of the room filled to the brim with lightly pinked bubbles. There was a beautiful white wood vanity with a sink sunk into the middle. On the right side of

the sink was a massive collection of apothecary jars filled with soaps and bath salts in nearly every scent imaginable. To the left of the sink was a folded blue towel and face cloth. Next to that was a pile of cloths for

Lucy. She stripped quickly out of her dress, leaving it on the floor. She piled her hair up into a mess bun and slipped into the warm bath water. She sighed softly and leaned her head back against the lip of the tub

and relaxed. She fully enjoyed her soak knowing full well she would most likely go without a truly proper bath until they reach Cair Paravel. When Lucy began to wrinkle she figured it was a good idea to get out. She

toweled off with the most plush towel she had ever used. She wrapped it around her body and took stock of the cloths that had been supplied. It was a tunic and a pair of pants much like she worn on the Dawn

Treader before. She pulled on the pants which were well tailored and fitted. The shirt was slightly less billowy than last time, five years of time had also given her more to fill the shirt with. She pulled on the same belt

she had worn before and a pair of leather boots. She left her hair as it was. The mess atop her head looking rather becoming with the few strands that had come lose around her face and the nap of her neck. She

took in her appearance. Lucy was very pleased, with a smile to her own reflection she bounded from the room to find breakfast and more importantly Caspian. She found the dining hall where Coriakin, Caspian,

Lilliandil and Captain Drinian were seated each with a plate of food. When she entered the men, gentlemen indeed they were began to stand.

"Please, stay seated," Lucy said waving them off.

Caspian stood any way and pulled out the chair to his right. Coriakin sat at the head of the table with Caspian to his right and Drinian to his left. Lilliandil was seated next to the Captain. She smiled in greeting

towards Lucy.

"We shall be setting sail within the hour Your Majesties." Drinian spoke before standing. "I need return to the ship."

"Very well Captain." Caspian said with a smile. "We will join you soon."

Drinian left with a bow. Lucy piled her plate with eggs, bacon and fruit. She tucked in heartily but lady like. Caspian chuckled.

"What?" Lucy asked with a slightly full mouth.

"Nothing love, nothing at all." Caspian chortled and returned to his own plate.

They finished breakfast and walked towards the beach with Coriakin.

"I am glad to have seen you again Coriakin," Lucy spoke and gave the Magician a hug.

"As I am your majesty." He returned the hug with a friendly squeeze.

"If you ever need anything at all, never hesitate to ask," Caspian said clapping Coriakin on the back.

"It was good to meet you Coriakin," Lilliandil said with a small curtsy.

"Thank you all and may your journey home be a safe one," Coriakin said with a smile and a wave. He turned and walked back to the mansion.

The three made their way to the long boats and returned to the Dawn Treader. As soon as Lucy's feet hit the familiar deck of the ship she gave an excited squeal and jumped around laughing like a mad woman. She

turned on the balls of her feet to take in every inch of the ship as quickly as possible. She lost her balance only to be caught in Caspian's arms. She looked up at him. The sun was shining behind him creating a halo

around his head. Lucy was caught breathless. It was feeling that happened every time she looked at Caspian and she knew it would always be that way. He leaned in with his strong arms supporting her back and

kissed her. If Lucy wasn't already half swooned she certainly would have been with the tenderness of her king's kiss. Soon he hoisted Lucy back to her feet. It was now that Lucy noticed the bustle around them to

prepare the ship to weigh anchor. She blushed knowing they had made a bit of a scene.

"Go show Lilliandil my cabin, I had a cot brought in. If you don't mind bunking together?" Caspian asked the two girls.

"That's fine with me," Lucy said smiling at Lilliandil who nodded back at her. "Alright then. I'll be back."

Lucy took Lilliandil's hand and lead her to the cabin. When Caspian had said 'cot' Lucy had imagined some uncomfortable, hard as a rock, really roughing it cot. It was however a rather large hammock lined with a

goose down blanket, tons of pillows and the book Lucy had been reading before she had left. Her dagger and cordial exactly where she had left. Lucy flopped into the hammock and sighed continently.

"I suppose I'll take the bed then," Lilliandil said with a laugh.

Lucy laughed with her. "This is nice. I'm glad to have a girl on the voyage with me."

"Agreed. I am glad to have a friend in you Lucy. Should we help prepare the ship to leave?" Lilliandil asked.

"I do believe we should." Lucy pulled herself out the hammock and she and Lilliandil locked arms and returned to the deck.

* * *

><p>More coming soon! Please Review! thanks agian! I hope you guys are enjoying this!<p> 


	5. Chapter 4

The sea air hit Lucy and her eyes slid shut. She had missed being at sea. It occurred to Lucy that at long last she could feel somewhat normal. She could make lasting plans. She could again explore Narnia. Visit the

places she hadn't seen in what felt like forever, visit new places and make plans with Caspian. Lucy was where she truly belonged, finally. She felt to strong arms come up around her. She knew it was Caspian. She

leaned back against his chest, her eyes still closed. Caspian's beard tickled her cheek as he placed his chin on her shoulder.

"Welcome back Lucy," Caspian whispered in her ear.

Lucy put her hands on top of his that were clasped around her waist. They stood there wrapped in each other's arms. Lucy opened her eyes to look out across the sea. At long last her heart felt healed. The ship had

set sail in the time it took Lucy and Lilliandil to return to the deck. They were on calm seas with a strong breeze. It was as though the breath of Aslan were behind the sails. Their stores were fully stocked. They had

no need to stop until they reached home. The sailing was simple. The were guided sure and easy by the wind and the currents. Later Caspian and Drinian were going over the charts, Lilliandil had found Edmund's

favorite perch at the prow of the ship at the Dragon's head to feel the salty spray upon her face, Lucy had decided to head back to the cabin and take stock of the available clothing. Thinking that with two girls

sharing cloths, she might have to do some washing. It seemed Aslan had answer Lucy's prayers yet again. The wardrobe was bursting with cloths for her and Lilliandil. Thankfully for Lucy there were plenty of pants

and flowing shirts. She shut the door with a satisfied nod and decided to read a bit. She flopped into the hammock setting it to rocking back and forth. The book she had been reading was one that she had found on

Caspian's night stand the first few days she was staying in his cabin last time. When she had asked him about it, Caspian told her that it was the very book his teacher had read to him as a small boy, under the rein

of his tyrannical uncle Miraz. It was a book full of tales and legend's about Narnia. Most of these stories had to do with her siblings, during their rein. Lucy had read all these stories before she had left. Reading them

had been met with laughter, some tears and a flood of memories from the long life she had led in Narnia. She was endlessly overjoyed to be given a second chance to live in the magical place again. The only story

left was the story of when the High Kings and Queens had gone hunting for the White Stag and had disappeared without a trace. She knew how the story had ended. She had rediscovered the lamp post, she

recognized it as though from a half forgotten dream. Her siblings had followed her through the wardrobe much as they had the first time. They tumbled out and had found themselves returned to the children that

they were. Lucy had remembered how many times she had gone into the wardrobe later and had pounded on the back of it hoping to be allowed back in. She closed the book with a snap and ran a hand across her

face. She had felt guilty later, having left their people. It was a soft knock on the door and who opened it that reminded her again that the past didn't matter.

"Lucy?" Caspian asked opening the door.

She placed the book above her head and opened her arms in invitation. Caspian smiled, quickly closed the door and joined her in the hammock. Caspian gathered her into his arms, her head resting on his shoulder. If

she had been able to return so soon after that first trip she never would have met Caspian in the first place, or have been allowed the joy of their love now.

"I love you," She told Caspian and pressed a kiss to his shoulder.

Caspian squeezed her gently. "I love you."

Lucy sighed and let go of the pain and guilt that she had been holding on to. No more looking back, she would move forward with the wonderful gift she had been given. They stayed cuddled together until Lilliandil

came and got them for dinner. Lucy and Caspian were nearly inseparable for the duration of the trip. Any moment they had together they would take it, as though they were afraid to be out of each other's presence

for too long. Even if they were on opposite sides of a room or the ship, their eyes would find each other. They had an understanding between them that allowed them to practically know what the other was thinking

without saying anything. The sailing had been easy. The strong breeze blowing them to the Lone Islands more quickly than anticipated. The island was thriving. With the slave traders gone, life had returned to

normal. The sail home was calm and exciting. Lucy was looking forward to seeing the kingdom of again. The explore all the places she had been before, and had never seen. Lucy changed into a crushed red velvet

dress with sleeves that belled out at the elbow. She had combed her hair out and was wearing in lose curls around her shoulders. She looked every bit a Queen of Narnia. She joined Caspian and crew on deck as they

came closer to shore. Lucy could see Cair Paravel rising from between the trees as they sail closer to the cliffs. She was completely in awe. Caspian had been having the castle restored to it's former glory, brick by

brick. It looked both exactly how Lucy remembered it, but at the same time completely different. It appeared more like home than it ever had before, even in all her years of living there. A peace came over her as

Caspian grasped her hand and then looked together upon the castle. The ship docked and they disembarked. They were greeted by the towns people, who were very happy to have their King back. There was a

celebration in the town square. Lucy saw Caspian many regents who had been taking care of the Kingdom in his absence. She recognized the shortest member of this approaching party very well.

"Should we play a little trick on Trumpkin?" Caspian whispered in Lucy's ear. He wiggled his eye brows at her in a conspiratorial kind of way.

"Oh yes! Lets!" Lucy answered with a giggle.

She moved to hid behind Caspian and Lilliandil.

Trumpkin approached the king and bowed deeply. Lucy stifled a giggle, she had missed the dwarf.

"Your majesty, welcome home." Trumpkin greeted as he came out of his bow.

He took sight of Lilliandil standing close to Caspian. "Have you found us a Queen on your travels, your highness?"

"Why yes I have Trumpkin, allow me to present her," Caspian said and with a flourish of his hand, he and Lilliandil parted. Caspian bowed as Lilliandil curtsied, reveling Lucy.

"Hello dear little friend," Lucy greeted.

The look on Trumpkin's face was priceless and Lucy would carry it with her to the grave as one of her fondest memories. Trumpkin was awe struck, his mouth opening and closing like a fish.

"I am sure you remember Queen Lucy the Valiant?" Caspian prompted.

Trumpkin seemed to have forgot himself, he had suddenly sat down upon the cobbled street. Lucy was starting for guilty for playing this trick on him. When she looked over at Caspian however, his face seemed to

say 'it would have happened like that any way.' He shrugged his shoulders. Lucy rolled her eyes and shook her head at him. She walked over and kneeled in front of the seating dwarf.

"I am sorry to have surpised you Trumpkin. It is very good see you my dear DLF."

"Lucy? Is that really you?" Trumpkin asked studying her face.

"Yes it is." Lucy said smiling.

"How long have you been here?" Trumpkin asked still completely dazed.

"That's a long story Trumpkin," Caspian interrupted. "Let's get settled in the castle and we'll tell you our story and then you can tell us what's been happing in my absence."

"Of course Sire," Trumpkin stood and caught sight of Lilliandil. "Who is this shimmering buety you have brought with you?"

Lilliandil blushed and giggled. "I am Lilliandil, daughter of Ramandu. It is very nice to meet you Lord Trumpkin" she said with a curtsey.

The dazed look was back on Trumpkin's face.

"Come along my friend, they shall be more time to get to know each other later."

He nodded eyes still stuck on Lilliandil.

Caspian laughed and took Lucy's hand in his and the foursome tromped up to the Castle.

* * *

><p>Sorry this was so short you guys, I just wanted to put something up so you know I am hard at work. Chapter five coming up soon! Please review! thanks!<p> 


	6. Note 2

Sorry this has been taking me so long you guys! I promise I am still writing and I will have more up soon! It has just been an extremely busy two weeks. Updates soon I swear!


End file.
